As I sit here, sipping a cup of tea, admiring my garden and thinking back, I realize how much has changed within me. It's funny how life works. What once felt like a comfortable place to be now feels stifling. The things I used to tolerate, the ones I thought I could endure forever, have become the very things I can't stand anymore. And it’s not just about what I can or can’t put up with; it’s about how I express myself and the truths that are important to me.
There was a time, years ago, when I was the person who would rather stay quiet than cause a ripple. Blending in was easier. I would nod along, keep my opinions to myself, and let others take the lead. It wasn’t that I didn’t have thoughts or ideas; I just didn’t think they mattered enough to be shared. I held onto my silence like it was a shield, protecting me from judgment, criticism, or, worse, confrontation.
But something shifted. Somewhere along the way, I found my voice. It didn’t happen overnight; it was a gradual process, like the way the seasons change. One day, I just couldn’t stay quiet anymore. It was as if all the words I’d kept bottled up for so long finally found a way out. And once they did, there was no going back.
Finding my voice at the office was quite the experience, from casual chats in the coffee room to making my point in the boardroom. It wasn’t always easy, but I knew that if I didn’t speak up, important perspectives—especially from the frontline and management—might never reach the leadership team. So, I made it a point to say what needed to be said, whether or not it was well-received. Sometimes, they listened, and sometimes they didn’t. But either way, I knew I had to keep speaking up because the issues and ideas I raised mattered. Even when my words didn’t lead to immediate action, it was worth it.
Finding my voice was liberating. It was like I discovered this powerful part of myself that was always there but hidden away. I spoke with conviction. My words weren’t just fillers in a conversation; they carried weight because they came from a place of truth. I no longer worried about blending in or making sure everyone else felt comfortable. Instead, I focused on being true to myself, even if it meant standing out.
There’s something incredibly powerful about being authentic. For a long time, I tried to fit into molds that weren’t made for me. I would downplay my strengths, hide my quirks, and do my best to be what I thought others wanted me to be. But the more I tried to conform, the more I felt like I was losing myself. It was exhausting and, quite frankly, unfulfilling.
So, I made a choice. I chose to embrace who I was, flaws and all. I stopped worrying about whether or not people would accept me because I realized that the only acceptance that truly mattered was my own. And with that acceptance came a sense of peace and confidence I had never known before.
Being authentic doesn’t mean being perfect. Far from it. It means being real, showing up as ourselves, even when it’s messy or complicated. It’s about not being afraid to speak up, to say what we really think, and to stand by our beliefs. It’s about not letting fear or doubt hold us back from being the person we were meant to be.
One of the most important lessons to learn and probably one of the hardest to execute, is the value of letting go. There are people, situations, and habits that, at one point, might have served a purpose in our lives. But as we grow and evolve, we realize that not everything is meant to stay. Holding onto things that no longer serve us only drags us down.
Letting go isn’t always easy. It can be painful, and it often requires a lot of soul-searching. But it’s necessary for growth. We need to learn to trust ourselves enough to walk away from what doesn’t feel right, even when it’s hard. This might mean stepping away from relationships that are no longer healthy, saying no to opportunities that don’t align with our values, or simply changing habits that no longer serve our well-being.
Finding my voice is more than just a personal journey; it's about speaking up for those who cannot advocate for themselves. I recently reached out for better services on behalf of adults with disabilities. This cause is incredibly close to my heart because of my youngest daughter, who faces her own unique challenges. For too long, I went with the flow, hesitant to rock the boat, fearing backlash, and worried about her vulnerability in the system. I've spent years navigating a delicate dance to keep the peace, but then realized that staying silent wasn't an option any longer. The need for improved services for adults with disabilities is urgent and cannot be ignored. I committed to being a voice for those who deserve better.
This endeavour has given me the strength to stand up for what truly matters, even when it feels difficult. It's not just about my own journey; it's about advocating for those who can't speak up for themselves. Through this new sense of purpose, I’ve learned that taking care of myself and my loved ones means letting go of fears and the need to please everyone. It's about creating space for what really counts—ensuring that those who need support, peace and well-being the most are not forgotten.
I was never good with change. Being open to new experiences and opportunities at one time didn't appeal to me. I was quite happy with the status quo. I held on tightly to the way things were and wasn't keen to adapt. It took awhile to see that change was not a threat, but a chance to become better. When I let go of what was holding me back, I made space for new experiences, new people, and new opportunities that are more aligned with who I am now.
This whole process is a journey of self-discovery. It’s not always smooth or easy, but it’s worth it. At some point, we all have to confront parts of ourselves that we don’t necessarily want to face, and may even have to make some tough decisions. But through it all, we come to understand ourselves in ways we never have before.
Self-discovery is a continuous process. It’s not something we complete and then move on from. It’s about constantly learning, growing, and evolving. It’s about being open to change and willing to adapt as we uncover new aspects of ourselves.
There’s a certain freedom about it all. No longer feeling the need to pretend or put on a facade. We don’t have to hide parts of ourselves to make others feel more comfortable. Instead, we can show up fully, as we are, knowing that we are worthy of being heard.
Setting boundaries and not being afraid to enforce them. Recognizing when something isn’t right for us and having the courage to say so. Not compromising values or integrity for the sake of others. And most importantly, living a life that is true to who we are, not who others want us to be.
Change is a part of life that we can’t avoid, no matter how much we might want to. But instead of fearing change, I’ve learned to embrace it. Change has pushed me out of my comfort zone and forced me to confront things I would have otherwise ignored.
As I move forward, I do so with courage and conviction. I know that there will be challenges and obstacles, but I also know that I have the strength and resilience to overcome them. I’m no longer afraid to speak my mind or to stand up for what I believe in. I’m no longer willing to settle for anything less.
This isn’t just about finding our voice; it’s about living a life that is authentic. It’s about not letting fear or doubt hold us back from pursuing our dreams or what we believe in. It’s about embracing the uncertainty and trusting that, no matter what, we are capable of handling whatever comes our way.
Always make room for the things that are truly important.
Our voice matters. Our truth is valid. Our journey is uniquely ours, and it’s worth every step.
Courage, conviction, and a whole lot of self-love goes a long way.
At the end of the day, being unapologetically you is the greatest gift you can give yourself.
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